Choose your own adventure
I think that was the name of one of the authors who wrote a great series of books, that instead of reading sequentially, like a 'normal' book would, you'd have to move to different pages via a system of luck written into the script or a choosing of paths.
Great stories, instead of the book containing one long narrative, you had the opportunity of experiencing a single short story, but with the ability to go back and change the decisions you've made. That would be nice... or would it? you decide.
I don't think time exists. There i said it. I think it's a measure of 'change' that we created, it cannot be seen, only retold. Which of course means it can be experienced, to some degree, but not the perfect truth of a situation that once was.
It might seem as if i'm forgetting live recordings, home movies, etc... think on the times you've watched them... do they ever give the full story? I've never felt so.
Anything is possible... truly great advice.
To keep me occupied until my great adventure, i need activity, i love being active but have never controlled it well, this time it will be different because i'm aware of the antagonist in my story (spoiler: it's me mwahahaha). My first thoughts were on capability, am i capable of exploring the world, even if i had the opportunity. Yes, but not very comfortably, and i have found a limit in growth that can be managed with comfort.
I plan to improve my fitness,
learn a language,
learn to ride a motorbike (affordability over a car),
learn a bit of self defense,
All of these are achievable in the 6 to 10 year timescale i have set out, plus, they are all things i want to do individually and now i have given myself a reason.
When you work it out, there is still room for more.
I care about people, i think (with some help) i could have room to help within the care community (which could do with all the help it can get). So additionally to improving my capability to explore i can fulfill further ambitions of helping my fellow humans whilst helping myself. I'm starting to do that already by looking into opportunities to explore the care community, like research and stuff.
I am also looking at work in a new way. no stress of career or influence i'd rather not have to contend with, instead I think about "how can i get money to do the things i want to do" and that's it, everything else is negotiable.
A month ago i had no plan, no idea of a plan, maybe its a bigger deal to me because it's a new experience. That is very much a mental health thing i think, i cannot explain to you how i am feeling, is this clarity what most people have all the time? how would any of us ever really know?
What i do know is that i can feel it, so why should i deny it?
thanks for reading, that is the first bit over i think... it's been a pleasure.